i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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