And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
