When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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