The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
