Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
