ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
