kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize
