I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
