i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
We don't watch enough power rangers
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
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