Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
why didn't you poke me back
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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