Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
The ass gains better be worth it
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
