The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
