If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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