he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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