grandma shit on top of the toilet
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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