Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize
