Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
