Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Randomize
