somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
