I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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