BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
i dont even know how to be here
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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