fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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