is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
