The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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