Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
