break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
