I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize
