Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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