I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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