Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
