I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
that is very illegal...i love you.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
