Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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