maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
