i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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