Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
