why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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