Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
