It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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