So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Randomize
