I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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