Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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