Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
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