I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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