I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
