lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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