My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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