fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
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