We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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