final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
