And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
