I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Soap is not a condiment
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
